As Michiganders acclimate to sheltering in place, it’s important we find the right beer to hibernate with. Something dark, something sweet, something boozy. Something to lend a reprieve from the newsfeed. Lo and behold, City Built Brewing Company’s 5 Hour Stout, a pastry stout brewed with obscene amounts of coconut and vanilla. It’s thick enough to put a bear to sleep so it should do the trick for those intent on napping away the next few weeks.

5 Hour Stout is the second release in City Built’s Fibonacci Sequence, a series that tests the effects of boil times on beer in accordance to a divine string of numbers. You’ll find that as the numbers increase so does the ABV. The original 3 Hour Stout registered at 10.5%, 5 Hour ramps up to 13.5% and rumor has it that the final 21 Hour Stout could clock in at 19%. Drink all of them in succession to come face to face with your maker.

Ed Collazo, CEO of City Built Brewing Company, said that 5 Hour Stout was inspired by the classic Girl Scout Samoa. While the nose smells identical to the cookie, my palate was reminded of another dessert: Snack Pack chocolate pudding. This thing is squishy with a consistency like emulsified fudge. Imagine treading water in Willy Wonka’s chocolate river. 

Flavor-wise, you taste perfect-brown marshmallow, white chocolate, and a preponderance of coconut. Make no mistake, this beer is indulgent, but where some coconut beers verge on the artificial or worse, “lotion-esque”, 5 Hour Stout nails that authentic shaved fruit essence. If you tire of drinking it—but honestly how could you?—use it to make brownie batter.

It’s inky as the void and if you’re not careful it’ll swallow you whole. Maybe that’s for the best. Stock up and welcome a stout worthy of the apocalypse.

Feature Image Photo Credit: City Built Brewing Co.

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